chimbleysweep posting in lavenderdiary
15 April, 1984
I swear this diary won’t turn into a log of sexual exploits, but today Jack and I had sex again and it was better than the first time but it still hurts. Thankfully he’s going to content himself with kisses for now. He’s been very patient with me lately. The accident truly changed our dynamics. I have no doubts anymore. It’s almost as though the accident happened because I doubted him and he couldn’t figure out ways to prove himself to me. I never want to have such drastic methods become necessary again. Never. That was far too much. Too dangerous! Sometimes I catch him looking at me in a way that breaks my heart, as though he’s amazed I’m even alive. We’re too young for this nonsense.